Food is one of the most important parts of culture.  Obviously, we need it to survive, but it’s more than that.  Long lasting relationships are forged over food; business deals are made; people from seemingly incompatible cultures can come together over a good meal.  With that in mind, two Portland, Oregon women, Liz Connelly and Kali Wilgus decided to start a little restaurant that specialized in a dish they both really enjoyed: burritos.  Before opening though, they decided to learn as much as they could about making an essential ingrediant: tortillas.

Connelly and Wilgus packed their bags and headed south towards Mexico in search of the best tortilla possible.  Using as Connelly put it, “the worst broken Spanish ever,” the two learned as much as much as they could about making tortillas from tortilla ladies, who used techniques passed down from mother to daughter.  They were completely enthralled by the process, and how easy the ladies made it look. Often times though, the ladies would only tell them of ingredients and not techniques.  But Connelly and Wilgus were determined to learn how to make really good tortillas, so they went to plan b.  The two keenly observed the ladies making the tortillas, making careful notes of each step in the process.  They then returned to Portland to test what they had learned, making batch after batch of tortillas until they felt like they got it right.  Excited, the two opened a food truck, and began to sell burritos with fresh, handmade tortillas holding everything together.  But just as soon as it started, Kook’s was shut down.

Were they causing people to get sick?  No.  Were people not excited about another food truck?  Portland is a bit of a Mecca for food trucks, so most likely not.  No, some Social Justice Warriors decided to relive those hard days of being two years old and realizing the world doesn’t revolve around them and threw a temper tantrum.  Connelly and Wilgus were guilty of the high “crime” of CULTURAL APPROPRIATION.  Oh the horror!

You see, when Connelly and Wilgus made the trip to learn about tortilla making, they apparently forgot to “compensate” the tortilla ladies.  Because in the strange world of SJWs, asking a brown person to voluntarily teach you how a key part of their culture is made, and maybe they don’t necessarily tell you everything there is to know, but you observe them doing it is the equivalent of riding into their village on an Abrams tank and threatening to turn the place into a pile of rubble if the villagers don’t give you what you want.  “If you don’t teach us how to make tortillas, we will accuse you of harboring terrorists, and will completely destroy your village!”  Not only did they forget to “compensate” people of color, it was women of color, thus making it the worst form of cultural appropriation.  By attempting to start a little business selling burritos, the exploitation was just too much.  One SJW, Alicia Dominguez said the following: “Awww, so you nice ladies stole hard-working and low-income Mexican women’s tortilla recipes and are now turning a profit.  That’s not basic white privilege at all.  #disgusting #kooksburritos #portland”  Fellow SJWer Tee McNeil wrote “Stealing is in their nature so I’m not surprised.  They’re not creative so they had to get the idea from someone.”  Holy shitballs!  That is some bona fide nonsense.  Exactly how Liz and Kali were hurting women in Mexico, I’m failing to understand.  It didn’t stop though.  Like  a pack of wolves, the SJWs smelled blood and continued their attack.  Kooks began losing money and were forced to close.

Portland’s SJW community celebrated their great victory over a couple of entrepreneurial minded women. The Portland Mercury called the closure a “victory.” Good job leftists, good job.  You saved the day from those evil women…  I think I might change a few details in this story just to prove how absurd the non crime of cultural appropriation is.

“Aww, so you nice ladies stole hard-working and low-income German women’s kartoffelkannpfuchen recipes.  That’s not basic Jew privilege at all.”   “The capture of Warsaw is a great victory over the menace of international Jewry, but more must be made in order to be secure.”

Yes the SJWs bitching about cultural appropriation is as absurd as a Nazi complaining about a Jewish shop owner having a more successful business.  It’s a good thing they don’t have the jack boot of the state backing them up.  At least, not yet.